![]() Matthew McConaughey’s Ample Butt Screen Time ![]() I imagine Baker was also considering a financially stable life in which he could spend all of his time searching for Justice the bluefin tuna. That’s when Karen shows up and offers Baker the chance to kill her abusive husband for $10 million, the nonfinancial incentive being that Baker could potentially reunite with his estranged son, Patrick (Rafael Sayegh), who may or may not be regularly subjected to Frank’s abusive behavior. These details are essential only because for the first 20-odd minutes of Serenity, the film comes across as fishing propaganda with no discernible plot. The bartender at the only bar on the island calls it “a tuna that’s in your head.” Baker could be making way more money if he caught swordfish at night and sold them to the local fishing companies, but he makes do with the occasional tourist fishing trip-and if not, Baker side-hustles as a gigolo for Constance (Oscar nominee Diane Lane!), who also has a pet cat that always gets lost and seems to find its way to him. ![]() He names this tuna Justice for some reason.īaker has tried so often and so hard to catch this fish that the other inhabitants of Plymouth Island chide him for it. This is his white whale, except that it’s a tuna. Along with his first mate, Duke (Djimon Hounsou), he makes money taking tourists out into the ocean to fish every day-except he sometimes yanks fishing rods away from his clients if he thinks he’s spotted a giant bluefin tuna he’s obsessed with catching. Why does a tropical-looking island sound like a place you’d find off the coast of Massachusetts? Don’t worry, we’ll address that later.īaker has a lot on his mind. That’s the name of McConaughey’s character in Serenity, a fisherman with a mysterious past living on Plymouth Island. Matthew McConaughey and the Moby Dick of Tunaīaker Dill. This is the five-step process of experiencing an instant so-bad-it’s-good classic. Serenity is an early and clear front-runner for WTF movie of the year.įair warning: From this point forward, everything about Serenity is going to be spoiled, in the order of the film’s bizarre narrative developments-which, conveniently, double as a rising scale of WTF moments leading all the way to the film’s conclusion. ![]() If you had told me the plot machinations of Serenity outright, I’d have politely asked to check your kitchen cabinets to ensure nothing was somehow laced with LSD. You could’ve offered me a thousand opportunities to guess what the movie’s really about, and I’d never have solved it. Nothing could’ve prepared me for Serenity-its ridiculous dialogue, fish-obsessed characters, and all-time bonkers plot twist. Well, having finally seen Serenity, let me just say: REOPEN ALCATRAZ AND GIVE STEVEN KNIGHT A LIFETIME SENTENCE. I didn’t want to know the details, but obviously, there was more to Serenity than meets the eye. Sexy fishing noir actually seemed to track, and seemed like a fun enough time.īut then, a week before the release, Polygon reporter Karen Han described it to me as “deranged.” “Arrest Steven Knight,” she added. If you watched only the trailer, you’d think you understand the basic premise: Matthew McConaughey is a fisherman on some tropical island who is approached by his ex-wife, Karen (played by Anne Hathaway), who’s willing to offer him $10 million if he will take her abusive, wealthy husband, Frank (Jason Clarke), out on his boat and dump him to feed the sharks. You don’t really need to read the tea leaves here: Serenity, a movie genuinely described by writer-director Steven Knight as a “sexy fishing noir,” was originally scheduled to come out in October and finally arrived in theaters this weekend. The hope is that enough people will emerge from their post-holiday idleness and spend their money on a (probably terrible) movie and, with any luck, that studio can turn a marginal profit. January is typically the ceremonial dumping ground for films that studios wish to forget about. ![]() It’s rarely a good sign when a movie slated for release in October, a month annually populated by Best Picture contenders ( A Star Is Born) and box office phenomenons ( Venom), gets pushed all the way to January. ![]()
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